Big Cheers to Us...December 24, 2021

Nearly one year ago today, I wrote about invitations, wondering what we would all be invited into this past year.

I sort of miss that Julie, honestly. The one who didn't really know, quite as up close and deeply deep, the raw heartbreak that can exist for us. The more naive one, with easier quips and retorts, the one with sass and flow.

I miss her.

The one with pre-chemo hair that she understood, the one who skipped into Starbucks every day. The one who thought a bad day was one with a couple inconveniences, the one who easily swung into the shop for sprinkle donuts.

Yes, I miss her, the charmed one in so many ways.

Maybe you miss someone or yourself today too, something that was before. Maybe you feel rocked by this year, and a little disoriented when you look around.

It might take awhile to come to grips with what I've seen this year, the changes that came along. There's been pretty brutal stuff and pretty tough waiting and waiting and waiting some more.

Maybe you waited this year, with your hand on heart, stomach turning flips and twists. Perhaps your heart is broken right now, and perhaps your heart is spinning cartwheels of merry giddy joy.

Either way, the world offers itself to you, to us, as the poet Mary Oliver soothes our souls.

My invitation this year wasn't to a sweet birthday party or to a wine tasting. It wasn't to the theater or on a fun trip...it was mostly somewhere else, somewhere I didn't want to go...or ever think that I would have to go.

But I went, yes I went...and you went somewhere too. And we showed up for it all, in one way or another. Perhaps we crawled and perhaps we skipped there, but we showed up for our lives, in our Sunday best.

We traveled through, this way and that, some moments of our choosing and some moments not at all. We were kicking and screaming, and then we went with big, extravagant smiles too.

And while it all might have been awfully difficult on our worst days, and absolutely jaw dropping gorgeous on our best days, we did it.

We did it, my friends.

So we say most kindly and gently to ourselves now, as we try our best to look with hope to our new year, full of invitations...

...you are braver than you believe, as A.A. Milne and dear Winnie the Pooh knew...

...for yes, we have all, each one of us, been brave this year, for living takes courage. It just does, even on the best and shiny and most sparkling days. We might lose a little sass and spin, but we make up for it with bravery.

So I thank you for all your massive encouragement and kindness, for keeping me afloat for minutes and hours and days...and Merry Christmas and I love you and yes, yes indeed...

...big cheers to us.

Salut! xxoo